Before the Fall
by jtav
Summary: Oleg Petrovsky is offered a chance to leave Cerberus by his old student. Unrequited Petrovsky/Miranda.


_Thanks to The Allusive Man for looking this over so quickly._

* * *

The scent of jasmine invaded Oleg's nostrils. He tensed. Nothing on Omega smelled of jasmine. It was all booze and sex and cheap perfume. The only thing on Omega that had ever smelled of jasmine was…

Miranda sat on the edge of his bed. The pale orange light of his computers cast shadows on her face. Her hair was shorter than it had been three years ago, with a ragged cut that was unlike her, and her jacket was rumpled, as if she'd slept in her clothes. She was thinner, too, her face gaunt and hard. And still, he couldn't breathe when he saw her.

"Hello, Oleg." She stood and came to him. Her steps were heavy, without even the hint of grace. But the smile was still hers. Not the knowing, arrogant smile of the woman who could do six impossible things before breakfast and knew it. This was the tentative, thoughtful girl who had decided a stranger was the best chance to escape her father and was plotting how to make him do it. She touched his hand. The warmth and strength were hers too.

"Miranda? What are you doing here? The Illusive Man told me you resigned, that that boy seduced you into leaving us." Jealousy scraped at him. Everyone knew how brilliant Shepard had been at Elysium and against Sovereign. He was also loud, impulsive, and unable to go five minutes without making something explode. Entirely unworthy of Miranda.

"Yes, I left. The Illusive Man wanted me to kill John. Two years of my life, simply thrown away. And…someone I had come to care for."

So it was true, all of it. Anxiety replaced envy. "You shouldn't be here. If anyone else saw you, told Leng you were here—"

"Cerberus has been sending assassins after me for months." Her smile grew larger and some of that old, enchanting arrogance returned the luster to her skin. "You don't think all those drills you put me through were useless, did you?"

Oleg scarcely heard her as he paced the length of his quarters. Cerberus protocol demanded that he detain any former colleagues who left without authorization, but protocol could be made flexible, as he had done for Aria. "I can't hide you, but perhaps I could arrange for the detail guarding the hangar to be elsewhere while you commandeer a fighter."

She seized him by the arm. "I didn't come here to ask for your help. I came here to get you to leave Cerberus."

He froze. Leave Cerberus? He had given them nearly thirty years of his life. The Illusive Man had made his talents on the battlefield useful. The Alliance was too focused on integrating into the new galactic community. They didn't care that the Council races could destroy them as easily as they had destroyed the krogan. Cerberus was the only way humanity could be free and independent. No one else's wives or sons would die from mortar fire because they broke laws they hadn't even known existed. He had taught her that. "You were in a difficult position at the Collector base. I understand. But we all have our duty."

"He's gone mad, Oleg. It wasn't just John that made me leave. We were sent to investigate a derelict Collector ship. Only, it wasn't derelict. And the Illusive Man knew. He gave us no warning. Jacob almost died. He compromised the entire mission for intel we could have gotten half a dozen other ways. I'm not afraid to give my life for the cause, but I won't sell it so cheaply. And I certainly won't demand that people under my command throw their lives away." She shivered. "And when he talked about the Collector technology, he was like a man possessed. It was more than a way to stop the Reapers. It was as if his entire life had been building to this moment. I don't think he even cared about the colonies."

"Of course he c—" Oleg stopped. Aria had said much the same. He had laughed at the thought of the Illusive Man sacrificing so many of those who had pledged their lives to Cerberus for the sake of the diversion. Aria would say anything to gain an edge over her opponent. But the Illusive Man had never denied the accusation. And Miranda might be mistaken, but she was no liar. The Illusive Man had funneled credits Oleg had needed to supply his men to the Lazarus Project because he believed he was the only hope of stopping the Reapers. To dispose of him before they even arrived would be rank foolishness. _Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. Three times is enemy action_.

His shoulders slumped. Yes, it could be true. The Illusive Man could be throwing lives away in his quest for Reaper technology. Even his most loyal operatives could have no more value than pawns, when they should have been treated as rooks and queens. Someday Oleg's men might be thrown into the meat grinder. "What would you have me do? "

Her fingers ghosted to the back of his hand. Her skin was still smooth, despite everything she'd endured. "Leave Cerberus. Come with me."

"And do what? Do you imagine the Alliance will forgive us? We'll be imprisoned for the rest of our lives while they bleed us dry of everything we know. And that's if they're feeling generous."

"I know," she said quietly. "I don't expect the Alliance will do anything other than shoot me on sight. But we can't stay. There's a rumor that some scientists fled. We can find them. We'll protect humanity the right way."

He could almost see it. The heroic defectors scurrying from place to place, moving each time Leng closed in. They'd work on the scraps of projects they had managed to salvage. He could fashion them into a respectable fighting force that could hold their own while they prepared for evacuation. And they would do absolutely nothing for the war effort. "I can't. As ruthless as he might be, the Illusive Man is committed to defeating the Reapers. No one else wants to even acknowledge their existence. His is the only way forward."

"Do you believe that?"

"I must believe it. Perhaps I can mitigate the worst of it. Stop the adjutants from coming back here, if nothing else. Someone has to protect the people here. Aria certainly wasn't."

"And when the day comes that he orders you to kill someone you love?"

He sighed and looked at her. Love had always come after duty. She had been his subordinate at first. He had been tasked with shaping a girl who had never left her father's property into an operative. Acting on his desires would have been unbecoming of a Cerberus officer. And after? Well, the valiant were sometimes cowards. "I have an order to kill you, and yet you aren't dead."

She gripped his right hand and raised it to her lips as she kissed his fingertips and palm. Her lips were chapped and dry. Not at all as he'd thought they'd be. The pressure burned like a brand. Even now, he could follow her. No, he couldn't have her, but he could watch out for her and she for him. His honor would remain intact. No need to repeat that unpleasant business of threatening to destroy the station.

His comm rang, and Miranda jumped back as if she'd been struck. "Illusive Man for you, General."

"You'd better go." Miranda's voice was small and strained. "I won't be here when you get back."

His heart lodged somewhere in his throat. Miranda wouldn't fall to Leng or anyone else. She and her young man would live happily ever after. "Go. And perhaps…perhaps I'll see you when this war is over. Good luck to you, Miranda. "

"And to you."

He didn't look back as he left the room.

The Illusive Man's face was bathed in a red glow. He smiled, but his face contained none of his usual charisma or conviction. His eyes were cold and hard. Attila, not Charlemagne. He took a long drag on his cigarette. "I have a project for you, General. It's about the adjutants."


End file.
